The Lazy One

I believe, growing up, I may have actually received this descriptor in the course of a serious talking-to. In any case, it was known by all of us kids that I was the lazy one. I don't really know what the others were, although I can think of a few possibilities.

Mel Levine, god of diverse learners, has written a book, The Myth of Laziness. He says that everyone enjoys productivity, for many and obvious reasons. Some people just don't have an understanding of prioritization, time management, time at all, organization and task analysis.

Now, as you know, any excuse will do, but Mel doesn't really go for excuses. He goes for strategies. I am taking a look at myself, and I know darn well I'm not lazy. If I were, I wouldn't be so exhausted all of the time. However, and my colleagues will attest to this, I am severely messy, chronically tardy to and/or absent from appointments, and something of a loose cannon in airing my less-than-well-thought-out opinions.

Mel Levine admits to his own lack of material organization, saying that all of his colleagues know never to give him a master copy of anything (are you listening, Control Freak?) and has had to develop what he calls the threshold lump check: he never crosses a physical threshold without patting himself down for: keys, wallet, cell phone. I find those descriptions both hilarious and familiar.

I have the gift of language, and a big personality. I am persuasive. I am a quick thinker, but not a particularly analytical one. I go with my gut. I love beauty, idiosyncrasies and spontaneity. I like synthesis.

So, you tell me, am I in the right profession?

I look at my colleagues and try to isolate what makes them good- or brilliant- at what they do. One of them is a keen long-range planner, an anticipator of situations a long way down the road, a deliberate prioritizer and uncannily wise and circumspect. One of them is practically schizophrenic, and presents as a dingbat at least 50% of the day. Put her in a reading group, or coaching a colleague, however, and she has the most finely honed set of teaching/learning tools in the building. She is also gentle, gracious, funny and selfless. One of them is a self-described control-freak (like that's a BAD thing) and never has a moment in which she doesn't know exactly what her task is, the materials needed to accomplish it, exactly WHERE the materials are, the role of the task in the larger objective, and what the next moment, day and week will bring. She is perhaps the most perceptive among the four of us about the strengths, motivations, and weaknesses in each of her students, and exhibits the most patience with them. Her room, incidentally, is immaculate.

I suppose Mel would tell me to pick which of those attributes to work on first. My problem can be summed up, I guess, by my lack of appreciation for small steps that lead to greater triumphs. I'm too ORGANIC- too much of an IDEA person and too little involved with following through. I also am fond of my leisure pursuits, although there's a distinct lack of prioritization even there.

It is not lost on me that I am using precious time by WRITING ABOUT these frustrations instead of DOING something about them. I am aware, also, that the CONTROL FREAKS might wish in some respects to have some of the attributes that I have. But the knee-deep squalor, at home and at work, is not leading to the success of my own children and students. And that success really is at the heart of all of my aspirations.

Sigh. I think I'll go READ SOME MORE, and top off this cup of coffee.